First of all, the color. Is that lovely shade of pale pink the only option? I wasn’t planning on telling my baby what its sex is but now she will figure it out all for herself.
Because pink is for girls. Obviously.
Second, the cost. In these modern times when most of us parents are struggling…
…to differentiate ourselves by buying the most expensive strollers, hand knitting organic baby blankets and reviving Michelangelo from the dead to paint the nursery ceiling a perfect replica of “orangey-pink clouds in a blue sky with golden stars twinkling“ Nestle has the audacity to price this at (only) $284 plus $56 per 26 servings?
Honestly how is that supposed to make me feel special as a consumer if it won’t even keep the riff raff from owning it?
Third, this only comes in single servings. After I spent months searching for the perfect BPA free plastic bottles, throwing those out in my own personal landfill and re-stocking my house with American made glass bottles, how dare you make my investments obsolete!
Finally, where will this all lead? Apple juice chilled to perfection and served in personalized sippy cups? Mechanical sandwich cutters with special settings to re-shape bologna into each of your darlings’ individual spirit animals?
Let’s get real, the earlier my kid learns that I am neither a short order cook nor a barista the better.
The only good thing to come out of this is that it certainly makes my job as a charter member of the “BOOBS- Breastfeeding Only Or Baby(Seals) will be clubbed to death Coalition” easier.
If anyone I know puts this on their baby registry it will serve as my personal alert of who I need to “save”.
*ADDENDUM if you are humor impaired or plan to turn your comment into yet another formula feeding vs. breastfeeding debate please be advised that the best case scenario is your comment will be moderated or deleted and in the worst case scenario a team of Russian clowns will be dispensed to your home to force feed you fur coat.*